A Letter To My Children
Don't Worry, Be Happy
An excerpt from the book Grace Mothers: Letters to Our Children
With Mother’s Day coming up, I wanted to share a letter to the three boys who made me a Mom. My sons- Dylan, Cody, and Duke are my whole world. I couldn’t be more proud of them. I wrote this note a few years back, but wanted to share it for my other proud moms.
Guys,
I know you know, because I tell you all the time, how much I love you. You are my heart and soul, and I could not be prouder of the men you all are. Not that it’s been easy being a working mom – especially one who gets overwhelmed by the details of life and schedules. But I am grateful that I have had the privilege of being your mom. I also know the word ‘eye roll’ is how you would sum me up. I am the mom you love to laugh at. The mom who embarrasses you by dancing on stage with Flo Rida and Salt-n-Pepa. I can’t help myself, I like to have a good time.
Traveling the globe and sharing these experiences with you are some of my favorite memories. I am so glad I took you everywhere with me in my career – personal appearances, fashion shows... (even when I had ‘spit up’ on my back and didn’t know it!). I remember when you were growing up and had your friends over, I used to go crazy that there were 30 pairs of sneakers thrown all over the house. When you guys went to college and my house was spotless, I missed the mess. The first holiday when you were back home, the presence of 30 pairs of sneakers was so warm and comforting.
Susan Sarandon once advised me to hire a housekeeper to come on the weekends so I could take you guys to the park instead of cleaning. I regret that I didn’t listen to her. I wanted the house to be perfect (it never was). I wish I’d been able to let go of the mess and embrace the chaos (I’m still working on it). If I’d known how quickly it would go, I might have let go. But I loved all the ‘chores’ involved in raising you: nail cutting, baths, doctor’s visits, back-to schools and traveling soccer (even though I was voted the worst soccer mom because I only brought the team orange slices and organic cookies to eat).
You know I’m over-protective and always worried about you guys from the moment you were born – the crib, the stairs, the swimming pool and crossing the street; then the cars and teenage drinking. I can’t even talk about the Big Mountain skiing, or jumping out of planes! All I ever want is for you to be safe. You know Dad was the big supporter of all your life experiences and, in retrospect, I’m so glad he won. You are so lucky to have him as a father; there is no bigger supporter and teacher. Your dad was always there to support us all. He even hopped on a train to Florida with four-month-old Cody, who couldn’t fly because of an ear infection, to join me and Dylan at a magazine shoot. As scared as I’ve been for your safety, I have been fearless in my work.
I was raised with love and kindness, and the belief that I could do anything and be anyone. When I found makeup at university, I thought this is what I love and I want to make a career out of this. Why not? So my advice to you all is, don’t think too much – just do it. Don’t be afraid of failure. If you’re not happy in a job, then find a new one. Or better yet, be the entrepreneurs I know you are. Make sure that being healthy is a top priority. Feeling good and strong will allow you to be your personal best. Lastly, what I wish for all of you is what has given me the most happiness – a happy marriage, great kids, good friends and time to enjoy them.
Love,
Mom
That’s such a heartfelt letter, and it really resonated with me!
I worked for Glenby International in Oxford and went on to buy a salon at 20 against lots of advice. My wonderful husband and 3 sons constantly juggled sport clubs and school pick ups whilst I worked and took evening classes to get to university at 35yrs and become a midwife. They’re all wonderful sons and we’re very close but they do love to tell tales about me sleeping in the car outside piano lessons and how our eldest son would give our youngest son a ‘backy’ to get back from school when I was late! Lots of love though and I wouldn’t change a thing.
Thank you for sharing and happy Mother’s Day Bobbi. 😘
When I had the pleasure of interviewing you for InStyle back in 2001 with Sylvia Plachy doing the photos, I remember you and Sylvia talking about your sons and you were both so proud of them. I didn't have my daughter then and it was wonderful listening to your shared joys of motherhood. Her son is Adrien Brody and every time I see him on screen I think of the secret power of proud mums and the great men you've raise. Happy Mother's Day!